Released: 15th November 2019
Written & produced by Joe Edwards
Mixed & mastered by Jimmy Deer
Artwork by Rebecca Head
Love and thanks to Rebecca Head, Adam Guest, Adam Head, Fisayo Akinade, Ryan Wilkins, Jelena McDonagh, Tom McEvoy, Rosie Downes, Phil Anderson, Ann & David Head, Kate & Keith Edwards, Sam Noble, James Melaugh, Alex Keague-Davies, Nathan Liddle-Hulme & everyone at AWAL, the Katherine Monk Ward of Kings College Hospital, the London Ambulance Service, the London Fire Brigade and the residents of Gordon Road.
2 Hours, Relived
Truly terrible things happen to people all the time, and this is not that bad, but four days after my third wedding anniversary I break my leg.
Cycling home, not even that fast but it had been raining and the road surface isn’t that great, the bike skids out from under me and I fall and when I try to, I can’t get up.
Two strangers stop and ask me if I'm OK and I say no. They phone an ambulance and someone phones my wife and they send her a photo of me lying in the road for some reason and soon the adrenaline wears off and I start screaming quite a lot. In the breaks between the screaming I hear dogs barking in response and it echoes around the nearby buildings and I guess it does when I'm screaming too.
There are different types of ambulance in terms of what pain relief they carry so when the first ambulance turns up and they ask on a scale of one to ten how much pain you’re in and you say an eight or a nine and they give you gas and air and it still hurts too much to move they will call the morphine ambulance.
My wife has arrived and is giving me the thumbs up in an encouraging way and I’m apologising for not being brave and this must be distressing for her and they’ve cut my clothes off to get a better look at my leg but that means that quite a lot of people have now seen my penis which isn’t ideal. I’ve also had a panic attack.
The morphine ambulance arrives and someone says don’t worry you’ll feel amazing in a sec but nothing seems to change so it turns out that there’s another ambulance driving around that you can call if you need ketamine.
I can hear the paramedics talking about how I must have broken my hip as well but later it turns out that I've only broken my right femur. That’s the hardest bone in the body to break my friend Ryan will tell me and I'll say well it felt pretty easy to me which we’re all agreed is a great line but right now I’m having another panic attack, and I don’t so much have a body anymore I’m connected to something on the floor I don’t recognise that only experiences pain and I can’t turn it off.
Finally I have to roll off my right side and onto a stretcher in three or four jagged movements and have you ever actually screamed like really screamed, and then they get me in an ambulance.
In ten days I’m at my in laws’ house staying on a bed in their living room because our flat has too many stairs. I keep thinking about the two hours I spent on the ground which is very hard not to think about so I decide to really really think about it a lot and try to write some music at the same time.
I hope I can stop thinking about it now.